Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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