Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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