remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
