just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
