I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
