it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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