The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
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Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
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he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
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