Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
