Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
