we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
