i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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