yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize