Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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