I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
you mean i was at the winter classic?
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
