So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
