when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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