i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Randomize
