Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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