I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
