well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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