btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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