we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
why is half of my head shaved?
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