got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
