On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Can I color on your dick again?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
So here I am, sexting at work.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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