I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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