are you still at the devil's house?
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
