i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize