Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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