He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
