Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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