it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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