Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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