Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
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