i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
