On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
