google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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