Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Found the puke drawer
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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