i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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