we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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