They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize