East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
