ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
