Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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