So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Randomize
