Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  ____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...

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  (914): ____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker... http://tfl.nu/8now
  Replies (1) Good night (1070) Bad night (450) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.

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  (816): He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine. http://tfl.nu/bj2r
  Replies (103) Good night (615) Bad night (8761) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best

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  (919): we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best http://tfl.nu/79hx
  Replies (19) Good night (1620) Bad night (4463) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.

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  (315): I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite. http://tfl.nu/f93w
  Replies (8) Good night (4160) Bad night (648) Order T-Shirt
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense

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  (920): I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense http://tfl.nu/23hg
  Replies (5) Good night (2603) Bad night (570) Order T-Shirt
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  (226): View more from Ontario

  I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.

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  (226): I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience. http://tfl.nu/aa3x
  Replies (1) Good night (1644) Bad night (1001) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities

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  (817): But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities http://tfl.nu/pt4w
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog

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  (907): Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog http://tfl.nu/oh2n
  Replies (16) Good night (2681) Bad night (946) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."

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  (901): I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower." http://tfl.nu/7vf5
  Replies (4) Good night (1694) Bad night (443)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...

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  (440): Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits... http://tfl.nu/u2u5
  Replies (3) Good night (825) Bad night (684) Order T-Shirt
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"

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  (647): Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?" http://tfl.nu/c4jm
  Replies (2) Good night (297) Bad night (796) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.

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  (401): I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things. http://tfl.nu/cr6r
  Replies (4) Good night (1359) Bad night (233) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.

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  (503): Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be. http://tfl.nu/kby8
  Replies (5) Good night (466) Bad night (1034) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun

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  (716): I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun http://tfl.nu/488y
  Replies (0) Good night (691) Bad night (177) Order T-Shirt
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.

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  (501): Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again. http://tfl.nu/b8kl
  Replies (2) Good night (898) Bad night (140) Order T-Shirt

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