I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Banned from zoo.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
I'm going back tonight
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.