found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Duck Duck Cougar?
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i think i have herpe
just one?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
