should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize