What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Terrible idea I love it
I love you. Go after that dick
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
