There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
