so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize