I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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